A Snow and ski forum. SkiBanter

If this is your first visit, be sure to check out the FAQ by clicking the link above. You may have to register before you can post: click the register link above to proceed. To start viewing messages, select the forum that you want to visit from the selection below.

Go Back   Home » SkiBanter forum » Skiing Newsgroups » Alpine Skiing
Site Map Home Register Authors List Search Today's Posts Mark Forums Read Web Partners

The twelve days of Trunkmas



 
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #1  
Old December 17th 20, 03:49 PM posted to rec.skiing.alpine
[email protected]
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 118
Default The twelve days of Trunkmas

On the first day of Trunkmas Trunky showed to me
A used diaper from his friend Bert.

On the second day of Trunkmas Trunky showed to me
Two broken skis and a used diaper from his friend Bert.

(moving on)

On the fifth day or Trunkmas, Trunky showed to me,
Fiiiiiiiive Canadian things,
four used passes
three bent poles
two broken skis,
and a used diaper from his friend Bert.

(keep it moving)

On the eighth day of Trunkmas Trunky showed to me
eight cowards hiding
seven jars of mayo
six sheep a laying
fiiiiiiiive Canadian things
four used passes
three bent poles
two broken poles
and a used diaper from his friend Bert.

(and bring it home)


On the twelfth day of Trunkmas Trunky gave to me
twelve liars lying
eleven dumb****s blowing
ten crackheads smoking
nine faggots dancing
eight cowards hiding
seven jars of mayo
six sheep a laying
fiiiiive Canadian things
four used passes
three bent poles
two broken skis
and a used diaper from his friend Bert.


Merry Christmas

God Bless Us All

____________________________________________

Horvath

This signature is now the ultimate power in the universe

Support the military, or else.
Ads
  #2  
Old December 19th 20, 01:47 AM posted to rec.skiing.alpine
Eviel Dewar
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 686
Default The twelve days of Trunkmas

On Thursday, December 17, 2020 at 11:49:10 AM UTC-5, wrote:
On the first day of Trunkmas Trunky showed to me
A used diaper from his friend Bert.

On the second day of Trunkmas Trunky showed to me
Two broken skis and a used diaper from his friend Bert.

(moving on)

On the fifth day or Trunkmas, Trunky showed to me,
Fiiiiiiiive Canadian things,
four used passes
three bent poles
two broken skis,
and a used diaper from his friend Bert.

(keep it moving)

On the eighth day of Trunkmas Trunky showed to me
eight cowards hiding
seven jars of mayo
six sheep a laying
fiiiiiiiive Canadian things
four used passes
three bent poles
two broken poles
and a used diaper from his friend Bert.

(and bring it home)


On the twelfth day of Trunkmas Trunky gave to me
twelve liars lying
eleven dumb****s blowing
ten crackheads smoking
nine faggots dancing
eight cowards hiding
seven jars of mayo
six sheep a laying
fiiiiive Canadian things
four used passes
three bent poles
two broken skis
and a used diaper from his friend Bert.


Merry Christmas

God Bless Us All

____________________________________________


It's not a Christmas song, but I've been working on a parody of Paul McCartney's Uncle Albert/Admiral Halsey medley. Just a couple of lines so far:

Bertie-pervertie sodomized me
He stretched out my ass with his anal sodomy

There's going to be a line "glans across the water" that I have to work in somehow.
  #3  
Old December 20th 20, 01:00 AM posted to rec.skiing.alpine
[email protected]
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 118
Default The twelve days of Trunkmas

[Default] On Fri, 18 Dec 2020 16:15:14 -0800 (PST),
" wrote this crap:

On Thursday, December 17, 2020 at 8:49:10 AM UTC-8, wrote:
On the first day of Trunkmas Trunky showed to me
A used diaper from his friend Bert.

On the second day of Trunkmas Trunky showed to me
Two broken skis and a used diaper from his friend Bert.

(moving on)

On the fifth day or Trunkmas, Trunky showed to me,
Fiiiiiiiive Canadian things,
four used passes
three bent poles
two broken skis,
and a used diaper from his friend Bert.

(keep it moving)

On the eighth day of Trunkmas Trunky showed to me
eight cowards hiding
seven jars of mayo
six sheep a laying
fiiiiiiiive Canadian things
four used passes
three bent poles
two broken poles
and a used diaper from his friend Bert.

(and bring it home)


On the twelfth day of Trunkmas Trunky gave to me
twelve liars lying
eleven dumb****s blowing
ten crackheads smoking
nine faggots dancing
eight cowards hiding
seven jars of mayo
six sheep a laying
fiiiiive Canadian things
four used passes
three bent poles
two broken skis
and a used diaper from his friend Bert.


Hey, I'd be delighted to give you a present on the
first day of Xmas.


I wouldn't want anything you got especially crabs or HIV or any other
STDs.

Identify yourself, and I will show up and plant a size 14 in your nuts.


You lie. From your Mickey Mouse voice you probably wear size six.
I'll bet you can inhale helium and it doesn't change the sound of your
voice.

Besides, you already know that the last person who attacked me wasn't
sent to the hospital, he was sent to prison.

____________________________________________

Horvath

This signature is now the ultimate power in the universe

Support the military, or else.
  #4  
Old December 20th 20, 03:08 AM posted to rec.skiing.alpine
[email protected]
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 118
Default The twelve days of Trunkmas

[Default] On Fri, 18 Dec 2020 18:47:12 -0800 (PST), Eviel Dewar
wrote this crap:

On Thursday, December 17, 2020 at 11:49:10 AM UTC-5, wrote:
On the first day of Trunkmas Trunky showed to me
A used diaper from his friend Bert.

On the second day of Trunkmas Trunky showed to me
Two broken skis and a used diaper from his friend Bert.

(moving on)

On the fifth day or Trunkmas, Trunky showed to me,
Fiiiiiiiive Canadian things,
four used passes
three bent poles
two broken skis,
and a used diaper from his friend Bert.

(keep it moving)

On the eighth day of Trunkmas Trunky showed to me
eight cowards hiding
seven jars of mayo
six sheep a laying
fiiiiiiiive Canadian things
four used passes
three bent poles
two broken poles
and a used diaper from his friend Bert.

(and bring it home)


On the twelfth day of Trunkmas Trunky gave to me
twelve liars lying
eleven dumb****s blowing
ten crackheads smoking
nine faggots dancing
eight cowards hiding
seven jars of mayo
six sheep a laying
fiiiiive Canadian things
four used passes
three bent poles
two broken skis
and a used diaper from his friend Bert.


Merry Christmas

God Bless Us All

____________________________________________


It's not a Christmas song, but I've been working on a
parody of Paul McCartney's Uncle Albert/Admiral Halsey
medley. Just a couple of lines so far:

Bertie-pervertie sodomized me
He stretched out my ass with his anal sodomy

There's going to be a line "glans across the water"
that I have to work in somehow.


Sorry, kind villager. But you'll never have the gift.

Merry Christmas

God Bless Us All

____________________________________________

Horvath

This signature is now the ultimate power in the universe

Support the military, or else.
  #5  
Old December 20th 20, 08:48 PM posted to rec.skiing.alpine
[email protected]
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 118
Default The twelve days of Trunkmas

[Default] On Sat, 19 Dec 2020 18:25:15 -0800 (PST),
" wrote this crap:

Besides, you already know that the last person who attacked me wasn't
sent to the hospital, he was sent to prison.


You mean the imaginary drug dealer who wanted
get paid for the drugs he sold you?


I've never ever bought illegal drugs in my life.

Tell ya what, Huggies. I will believe that bull**** when you post a
valid police report number. How humiliating that you make that
laughable claim and got busted posting a fake number. Hilarious.
You couldn't take me on the best day of your life, and we
both know it.


You have a lot to learn, Trunky. I've been trained by mankind's best
military to be an unstoppable killing machine. I learned to jump out
of choppers using the Australian Rappel technique.
Look it up. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Australian_rappel
This method of attack is so fast and dangerous that you don't even see
it in the movies. Hollywood stuntmen refuse to do it. I've done it
dozens of times.

You would be dead before I even got my boots on the ground.

The motto of Air Assault is, "Death From Above."

Merry Christmas

God bless us all.

____________________________________________

Horvath

This signature is now the ultimate power in the universe

Support the military, or else.
  #6  
Old December 22nd 20, 03:14 AM posted to rec.skiing.alpine
[email protected]
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 118
Default The Night Before Trunkmas

[Default] On Sun, 20 Dec 2020 19:14:12 -0800 (PST),
" wrote this crap:

You couldn't take me on the best day of your life, and we
both know it.

You have a lot to learn, Trunky. I've been trained by mankind's best
military to be an unstoppable killing machine.


I was trained by mankind's best warriors,


A washed up sailor who made you march around on the lawn doesn't
count.

and unlike you, I've had plenty of practice in the real world.


Where, and what kind?

You got trained to pull telephone wires and answer the phone.

I learned to jump out
of choppers using the Australian Rappel technique.
Look it up. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Australian_rappel


Jeez, I've rappeled down cliffs and buildings. Easy.
Any idiot could do it.


You didn't even bother to look up that link. Anybody can rappel. I
learned to do it in Boy Scouts. But I'm talking Australian Rappel.
You go face first out of a chopper with one hand on the rope and one
hand holding your weapon, so you can fire on the move. Only the best
and bravest can do this. I trained at Fort Campbell, the home of the
Air Assault.

This method of attack is so fast and dangerous that you don't even see
it in the movies. Hollywood stuntmen refuse to do it. I've done it
dozens of times.


Bull****.


The truth and the whole truth.

No reason for a telephone operator to be jumping out of choppers,


The commo people have to be with the front line troops. How else do
you get information to the front, or from the front?

Abraham Lincoln had a telegraph installed in the White House during
the Civil War so he could get information from ongoing battles. Don't
you think someone was punching the key during the battle?

and you were not infantry.
You were a commo weenie. Period.


I was an officer. Period.

You would be dead before I even got my boots on the ground.


You would crap your diapers if you ever saw my boots on the ground.


I'd die laughing.

A lot of tough talk from a pathetic pussy who hides his identity.


Who's hiding?

The motto of Air Assault is, "Death From Above."


Merry Christmas

God Bless Us All

____________________________________________

Horvath

This signature is now the ultimate power in the universe

Support the military, or else.
  #7  
Old December 22nd 20, 08:36 PM posted to rec.skiing.alpine
[email protected]
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 118
Default The Night Before Trunkmas

[Default] On Mon, 21 Dec 2020 20:24:35 -0800 (PST),
" wrote this crap:

On Monday, December 21, 2020 at 8:15:06 PM UTC-8, wrote:
[Default] On Sun, 20 Dec 2020 19:14:12 -0800 (PST),
" wrote this crap:
You couldn't take me on the best day of your life, and we
both know it.
You have a lot to learn, Trunky. I've been trained by mankind's best
military to be an unstoppable killing machine.

I was trained by mankind's best warriors,

A washed up sailor who made you march around on the lawn doesn't
count.


Really? Never marched on a lawn in my life.

Another lie.

Used to run the obstacle course, but that was on sand.


Another lie. In my 22 years in the military I never saw an obstacle
course on sand. (Except the sand traps on a golf course, and those
are obstacles to be avoided.)

and unlike you, I've had plenty of practice in the real world.

Where, and what kind?


Show up and find out. Oooooops, that balls thing again.
You ain't even man enough to ID yourself. Change your diapers.

You got trained to pull telephone wires and answer the phone.

I learned to jump out
of choppers using the Australian Rappel technique.
Look it up. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Australian_rappel

Jeez, I've rappeled down cliffs and buildings. Easy.
Any idiot could do it.

You didn't even bother to look up that link. Anybody can rappel. I
learned to do it in Boy Scouts. But I'm talking Australian Rappel.
You go face first out of a chopper with one hand on the rope and one
hand holding your weapon, so you can fire on the move. Only the best
and bravest can do this. I trained at Fort Campbell, the home of the
Air Assault.


Didn't have to look it up, in several movies.


Another lie. Stunt men won't do it because it's too dangerous.

This method of attack is so fast and dangerous that you don't even see
it in the movies. Hollywood stuntmen refuse to do it. I've done it
dozens of times.


Bull****. I've seen it scores of times on tv and in the movies.


Another lie.

Bull****.

The truth and the whole truth.


Bull**** and the whole diaper.

No reason for a telephone operator to be jumping out of choppers,

The commo people have to be with the front line troops. How else do
you get information to the front, or from the front?


The commo people are rear area cowards, coward.

Abraham Lincoln had a telegraph installed in the White House during
the Civil War so he could get information from ongoing battles. Don't
you think someone was punching the key during the battle?


No, I think someone was way behind the lines, idiot. Just like you.


My MOS was 25A, Combat Communications Electronics Officer.
Note that the first word is, "Combat."

and you were not infantry.
You were a commo weenie. Period.

I was an officer. Period.


Bull****. You were wearing a seargeant's uniform in the pic you
posted, idiot.


Another lie. It was clearly an officer's uniform.

You know, when you photoshopped bird**** on the shoulder
boards and left arm to hide your rank?


Caught you. Officers have their rank on their shoulders, while
enlisted men have their rank on their sleeves half way between the
shoulder and the elbow. Clearly an officer's uniform. But you know
nothing about the military because you were a draft dodger.



____________________________________________

Horvath

This signature is now the ultimate power in the universe

Support the military, or else.
  #8  
Old December 22nd 20, 10:41 PM posted to rec.skiing.alpine
Eviel Dewar
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 686
Default The Night Before Trunkmas

On Tuesday, December 22, 2020 at 4:36:16 PM UTC-5, wrote:
[Default] On Mon, 21 Dec 2020 20:24:35 -0800 (PST),
" wrote this crap:

On Monday, December 21, 2020 at 8:15:06 PM UTC-8, wrote:
[Default] On Sun, 20 Dec 2020 19:14:12 -0800 (PST),
" wrote this crap:
You couldn't take me on the best day of your life, and we
both know it.
You have a lot to learn, Trunky. I've been trained by mankind's best
military to be an unstoppable killing machine.

I was trained by mankind's best warriors,
A washed up sailor who made you march around on the lawn doesn't
count.


Really? Never marched on a lawn in my life.

Another lie.
Used to run the obstacle course, but that was on sand.

Another lie. In my 22 years in the military I never saw an obstacle
course on sand. (Except the sand traps on a golf course, and those
are obstacles to be avoided.)
and unlike you, I've had plenty of practice in the real world.
Where, and what kind?


Show up and find out. Oooooops, that balls thing again.
You ain't even man enough to ID yourself. Change your diapers.

You got trained to pull telephone wires and answer the phone.

I learned to jump out
of choppers using the Australian Rappel technique.
Look it up. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Australian_rappel

Jeez, I've rappeled down cliffs and buildings. Easy.
Any idiot could do it.
You didn't even bother to look up that link. Anybody can rappel. I
learned to do it in Boy Scouts. But I'm talking Australian Rappel.
You go face first out of a chopper with one hand on the rope and one
hand holding your weapon, so you can fire on the move. Only the best
and bravest can do this. I trained at Fort Campbell, the home of the
Air Assault.


Didn't have to look it up, in several movies.

Another lie. Stunt men won't do it because it's too dangerous.
This method of attack is so fast and dangerous that you don't even see
it in the movies. Hollywood stuntmen refuse to do it. I've done it
dozens of times.


Bull****. I've seen it scores of times on tv and in the movies.

Another lie.
Bull****.
The truth and the whole truth.


Bull**** and the whole diaper.

No reason for a telephone operator to be jumping out of choppers,
The commo people have to be with the front line troops. How else do
you get information to the front, or from the front?


The commo people are rear area cowards, coward.

Abraham Lincoln had a telegraph installed in the White House during
the Civil War so he could get information from ongoing battles. Don't
you think someone was punching the key during the battle?


No, I think someone was way behind the lines, idiot. Just like you.

My MOS was 25A, Combat Communications Electronics Officer.


For Schattie, "MOS" stands for "Miserable Onanistic Sodomite".

Note that the first word is, "Combat."
and you were not infantry.
You were a commo weenie. Period.
I was an officer. Period.


Bull****. You were wearing a seargeant's uniform in the pic you
posted, idiot.

Another lie. It was clearly an officer's uniform.
You know, when you photoshopped bird**** on the shoulder
boards and left arm to hide your rank?

Caught you. Officers have their rank on their shoulders, while
enlisted men have their rank on their sleeves half way between the
shoulder and the elbow. Clearly an officer's uniform. But you know
nothing about the military because you were a draft dodger.


Yup. Ever hear of "epaulets", Schattie?
  #9  
Old December 22nd 20, 11:33 PM posted to rec.skiing.alpine
Eviel Dewar
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 686
Default The Night Before Trunkmas

On Tuesday, December 22, 2020 at 4:36:16 PM UTC-5, wrote:
[Default] On Mon, 21 Dec 2020 20:24:35 -0800 (PST),
" wrote this crap:

On Monday, December 21, 2020 at 8:15:06 PM UTC-8, wrote:
[Default] On Sun, 20 Dec 2020 19:14:12 -0800 (PST),
" wrote this crap:
You couldn't take me on the best day of your life, and we
both know it.
You have a lot to learn, Trunky. I've been trained by mankind's best
military to be an unstoppable killing machine.

I was trained by mankind's best warriors,
A washed up sailor who made you march around on the lawn doesn't
count.


Really? Never marched on a lawn in my life.

Another lie.
Used to run the obstacle course, but that was on sand.

Another lie. In my 22 years in the military I never saw an obstacle
course on sand. (Except the sand traps on a golf course, and those
are obstacles to be avoided.)
and unlike you, I've had plenty of practice in the real world.
Where, and what kind?


Show up and find out. Oooooops, that balls thing again.
You ain't even man enough to ID yourself. Change your diapers.

You got trained to pull telephone wires and answer the phone.

I learned to jump out
of choppers using the Australian Rappel technique.
Look it up. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Australian_rappel

Jeez, I've rappeled down cliffs and buildings. Easy.
Any idiot could do it.
You didn't even bother to look up that link. Anybody can rappel. I
learned to do it in Boy Scouts. But I'm talking Australian Rappel.
You go face first out of a chopper with one hand on the rope and one
hand holding your weapon, so you can fire on the move. Only the best
and bravest can do this. I trained at Fort Campbell, the home of the
Air Assault.


Didn't have to look it up, in several movies.

Another lie. Stunt men won't do it because it's too dangerous.
This method of attack is so fast and dangerous that you don't even see
it in the movies. Hollywood stuntmen refuse to do it. I've done it
dozens of times.


Bull****. I've seen it scores of times on tv and in the movies.

Another lie.
Bull****.
The truth and the whole truth.


Bull**** and the whole diaper.

No reason for a telephone operator to be jumping out of choppers,
The commo people have to be with the front line troops. How else do
you get information to the front, or from the front?


The commo people are rear area cowards, coward.

Abraham Lincoln had a telegraph installed in the White House during
the Civil War so he could get information from ongoing battles. Don't
you think someone was punching the key during the battle?


No, I think someone was way behind the lines, idiot. Just like you.

My MOS was 25A, Combat Communications Electronics Officer.
Note that the first word is, "Combat."


And here's the link for MOS 24A:

https://www.armystudyguide.com/conte...icer-25a.shtml

Schattie's was "Fag Who Lied about Fighting in Vietnam as a College Journalist". Not sure what the numeric designation for that one is.
  #10  
Old December 22nd 20, 11:51 PM posted to rec.skiing.alpine
Eviel Dewar
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 686
Default The Night Before Trunkmas

On Tuesday, December 22, 2020 at 7:44:49 PM UTC-5, wrote:
On Tuesday, December 22, 2020 at 4:33:38 PM UTC-8, wrote:
On Tuesday, December 22, 2020 at 4:36:16 PM UTC-5, wrote:
[Default] On Mon, 21 Dec 2020 20:24:35 -0800 (PST),
" wrote this crap:

On Monday, December 21, 2020 at 8:15:06 PM UTC-8, wrote:
[Default] On Sun, 20 Dec 2020 19:14:12 -0800 (PST),
" wrote this crap:
You couldn't take me on the best day of your life, and we
both know it.
You have a lot to learn, Trunky. I've been trained by mankind's best
military to be an unstoppable killing machine.

I was trained by mankind's best warriors,
A washed up sailor who made you march around on the lawn doesn't
count.

Really? Never marched on a lawn in my life.

Another lie.
Used to run the obstacle course, but that was on sand.
Another lie. In my 22 years in the military I never saw an obstacle
course on sand. (Except the sand traps on a golf course, and those
are obstacles to be avoided.)
and unlike you, I've had plenty of practice in the real world.
Where, and what kind?

Show up and find out. Oooooops, that balls thing again.
You ain't even man enough to ID yourself. Change your diapers.

You got trained to pull telephone wires and answer the phone.

I learned to jump out
of choppers using the Australian Rappel technique.
Look it up. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Australian_rappel

Jeez, I've rappeled down cliffs and buildings. Easy.
Any idiot could do it.
You didn't even bother to look up that link. Anybody can rappel. I
learned to do it in Boy Scouts. But I'm talking Australian Rappel.
You go face first out of a chopper with one hand on the rope and one
hand holding your weapon, so you can fire on the move. Only the best
and bravest can do this. I trained at Fort Campbell, the home of the
Air Assault.

Didn't have to look it up, in several movies.
Another lie. Stunt men won't do it because it's too dangerous.
This method of attack is so fast and dangerous that you don't even see
it in the movies. Hollywood stuntmen refuse to do it. I've done it
dozens of times.

Bull****. I've seen it scores of times on tv and in the movies.
Another lie.
Bull****.
The truth and the whole truth.

Bull**** and the whole diaper.

No reason for a telephone operator to be jumping out of choppers,
The commo people have to be with the front line troops. How else do
you get information to the front, or from the front?

The commo people are rear area cowards, coward.

Abraham Lincoln had a telegraph installed in the White House during
the Civil War so he could get information from ongoing battles. Don't
you think someone was punching the key during the battle?

No, I think someone was way behind the lines, idiot. Just like you.
My MOS was 25A, Combat Communications Electronics Officer.
Note that the first word is, "Combat."

And here's the link for MOS 24A:

https://www.armystudyguide.com/conte...icer-25a.shtml

Schattie's was "Fag Who Lied about Fighting in Vietnam as a College Journalist". Not sure what the numeric designation for that one is.

Holy ****, your buddy gets busted lying his ass off and all you can do is drag up ancient history.


Thank you for finally admitting that you lied about fighting in Vietnam as a college journalist. It sure took long enough!
 




Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

vB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Forum Jump

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
The Night Before Trunkmas [email protected] Alpine Skiing 9 December 22nd 20 02:56 AM
Away for a few days... Alan Baker Alpine Skiing 37 June 20th 09 09:45 PM
Ski Days SKIMORE Alpine Skiing 10 December 12th 04 04:43 PM
Ski Days SKIMORE Alpine Skiing 10 December 10th 04 09:34 PM
Opening days? Greg Hilton European Ski Resorts 1 October 22nd 03 05:42 AM


All times are GMT. The time now is 04:56 AM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.6.4
Copyright ©2000 - 2021, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Copyright 2004-2021 SkiBanter.
The comments are property of their posters.