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The Night Before Trunkmas



 
 
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  #1  
Old December 14th 20, 03:33 PM posted to rec.skiing.alpine
[email protected]
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Posts: 118
Default The Night Before Trunkmas

T' was the night before Trunkmas
and all through Steven's Pass
not a creature was stirring
not even Bert's lazy ass.
The ski gear was hung
in the hallway with care.
In the hopes that Trunky Claus
soon would be there.

With me at the computer
and wearing a robe and a cap
I was just settling down for
a long Trunkmas Eve's nap.

When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter
I sprang from my seat to see what was the matter.
When what to my wondering eyes should appear
a tiny dogsled and eight tiny huskies were there.

And a fat-assed driver so lazy and drunk
I knew in a moment it must be, "The Trunk."

He stomped onto the porch
and kicked in the front door,
grabbed the cookies and milk, and
said, "More and more."

He went to the kitchen, the fridge he did open.
Saw the goodies he wanted
and all the freebies he was hoping.
His pockets he filled with cranberries and yams.
His bag he filled with turkey and glazed hams.

He walked to the tree and said, "These presents are nice.
I'll sell them on e-bay, they'll fetch a good price."

He grabbed them all and went out to the yard,
got in his dogsled like a big tub of lard.
He cracked his big whip to awaken the team,
he cried out their names, so it would seem.

"On Flasher, on Barfer, on Boner, on Tits'on."
"On Vomit, on Stupid, on Ass-clown, and ****son."
"To the top of the fence, to the top of the wall.
Now fly away, fly away, once and for all."

And I heard him exclaim after he yelled, "You all suck."
"Crappy Trunkmas to all, Blow me dumb ****."

____________________________________________

Horvath

This signature is now the ultimate power in the universe

Support the military, or else.
Ads
  #2  
Old December 15th 20, 12:32 AM posted to rec.skiing.alpine
Eviel Dewar
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 686
Default The Night Before Trunkmas

On Monday, December 14, 2020 at 11:33:56 AM UTC-5, wrote:
T' was the night before Trunkmas
and all through Steven's Pass
not a creature was stirring
not even Bert's lazy ass.
The ski gear was hung
in the hallway with care.
In the hopes that Trunky Claus
soon would be there.

With me at the computer
and wearing a robe and a cap
I was just settling down for
a long Trunkmas Eve's nap.

When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter
I sprang from my seat to see what was the matter.
When what to my wondering eyes should appear
a tiny dogsled and eight tiny huskies were there.

And a fat-assed driver so lazy and drunk
I knew in a moment it must be, "The Trunk."

He stomped onto the porch
and kicked in the front door,
grabbed the cookies and milk, and
said, "More and more."

He went to the kitchen, the fridge he did open.
Saw the goodies he wanted
and all the freebies he was hoping.
His pockets he filled with cranberries and yams.
His bag he filled with turkey and glazed hams.

He walked to the tree and said, "These presents are nice.
I'll sell them on e-bay, they'll fetch a good price."

He grabbed them all and went out to the yard,
got in his dogsled like a big tub of lard.
He cracked his big whip to awaken the team,
he cried out their names, so it would seem.

"On Flasher, on Barfer, on Boner, on Tits'on."
"On Vomit, on Stupid, on Ass-clown, and ****son."
"To the top of the fence, to the top of the wall.
Now fly away, fly away, once and for all."

And I heard him exclaim after he yelled, "You all suck."
"Crappy Trunkmas to all, Blow me dumb ****."


OMG, I am laughing so hard!
  #3  
Old December 15th 20, 03:03 AM posted to rec.skiing.alpine
[email protected]
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 118
Default The Night Before Trunkmas

[Default] On Mon, 14 Dec 2020 17:32:25 -0800 (PST), Eviel Dewar
wrote this crap:

On Monday, December 14, 2020 at 11:33:56 AM UTC-5, wrote:
T' was the night before Trunkmas
and all through Steven's Pass
not a creature was stirring
not even Bert's lazy ass.
The ski gear was hung
in the hallway with care.
In the hopes that Trunky Claus
soon would be there.

With me at the computer
and wearing a robe and a cap
I was just settling down for
a long Trunkmas Eve's nap.

When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter
I sprang from my seat to see what was the matter.
When what to my wondering eyes should appear
a tiny dogsled and eight tiny huskies were there.

And a fat-assed driver so lazy and drunk
I knew in a moment it must be, "The Trunk."

He stomped onto the porch
and kicked in the front door,
grabbed the cookies and milk, and
said, "More and more."

He went to the kitchen, the fridge he did open.
Saw the goodies he wanted
and all the freebies he was hoping.
His pockets he filled with cranberries and yams.
His bag he filled with turkey and glazed hams.

He walked to the tree and said, "These presents are nice.
I'll sell them on e-bay, they'll fetch a good price."

He grabbed them all and went out to the yard,
got in his dogsled like a big tub of lard.
He cracked his big whip to awaken the team,
he cried out their names, so it would seem.

"On Flasher, on Barfer, on Boner, on Tits'on."
"On Vomit, on Stupid, on Ass-clown, and ****son."
"To the top of the fence, to the top of the wall.
Now fly away, fly away, once and for all."

And I heard him exclaim after he yelled, "You all suck."
"Crappy Trunkmas to all, Blow me dumb ****."


OMG, I am laughing so hard!


I have my good days.

____________________________________________

Horvath

This signature is now the ultimate power in the universe

Support the military, or else.
  #4  
Old December 15th 20, 07:15 PM posted to rec.skiing.alpine
Eviel Dewar
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 686
Default The Night Before Trunkmas

On Monday, December 14, 2020 at 11:03:36 PM UTC-5, wrote:
[Default] On Mon, 14 Dec 2020 17:32:25 -0800 (PST), Eviel Dewar
wrote this crap:
On Monday, December 14, 2020 at 11:33:56 AM UTC-5, wrote:
T' was the night before Trunkmas
and all through Steven's Pass
not a creature was stirring
not even Bert's lazy ass.
The ski gear was hung
in the hallway with care.
In the hopes that Trunky Claus
soon would be there.

With me at the computer
and wearing a robe and a cap
I was just settling down for
a long Trunkmas Eve's nap.

When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter
I sprang from my seat to see what was the matter.
When what to my wondering eyes should appear
a tiny dogsled and eight tiny huskies were there.

And a fat-assed driver so lazy and drunk
I knew in a moment it must be, "The Trunk."

He stomped onto the porch
and kicked in the front door,
grabbed the cookies and milk, and
said, "More and more."

He went to the kitchen, the fridge he did open.
Saw the goodies he wanted
and all the freebies he was hoping.
His pockets he filled with cranberries and yams.
His bag he filled with turkey and glazed hams.

He walked to the tree and said, "These presents are nice.
I'll sell them on e-bay, they'll fetch a good price."

He grabbed them all and went out to the yard,
got in his dogsled like a big tub of lard.
He cracked his big whip to awaken the team,
he cried out their names, so it would seem.

"On Flasher, on Barfer, on Boner, on Tits'on."
"On Vomit, on Stupid, on Ass-clown, and ****son."
"To the top of the fence, to the top of the wall.
Now fly away, fly away, once and for all."

And I heard him exclaim after he yelled, "You all suck."
"Crappy Trunkmas to all, Blow me dumb ****."


OMG, I am laughing so hard!

I have my good days.


' He walked to the tree and said, "These presents are nice.
I'll sell them on e-bay, they'll fetch a good price." '

Captures his sleazy self-serving low-rent character!
  #5  
Old December 15th 20, 09:48 PM posted to rec.skiing.alpine
[email protected]
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 118
Default The Night Before Trunkmas

[Default] On Tue, 15 Dec 2020 12:15:18 -0800 (PST), Eviel Dewar
wrote this crap:

On Monday, December 14, 2020 at 11:03:36 PM UTC-5, wrote:
[Default] On Mon, 14 Dec 2020 17:32:25 -0800 (PST), Eviel Dewar
wrote this crap:
On Monday, December 14, 2020 at 11:33:56 AM UTC-5, wrote:
T' was the night before Trunkmas
and all through Steven's Pass
not a creature was stirring
not even Bert's lazy ass.
The ski gear was hung
in the hallway with care.
In the hopes that Trunky Claus
soon would be there.

With me at the computer
and wearing a robe and a cap
I was just settling down for
a long Trunkmas Eve's nap.

When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter
I sprang from my seat to see what was the matter.
When what to my wondering eyes should appear
a tiny dogsled and eight tiny huskies were there.

And a fat-assed driver so lazy and drunk
I knew in a moment it must be, "The Trunk."

He stomped onto the porch
and kicked in the front door,
grabbed the cookies and milk, and
said, "More and more."

He went to the kitchen, the fridge he did open.
Saw the goodies he wanted
and all the freebies he was hoping.
His pockets he filled with cranberries and yams.
His bag he filled with turkey and glazed hams.

He walked to the tree and said, "These presents are nice.
I'll sell them on e-bay, they'll fetch a good price."

He grabbed them all and went out to the yard,
got in his dogsled like a big tub of lard.
He cracked his big whip to awaken the team,
he cried out their names, so it would seem.

"On Flasher, on Barfer, on Boner, on Tits'on."
"On Vomit, on Stupid, on Ass-clown, and ****son."
"To the top of the fence, to the top of the wall.
Now fly away, fly away, once and for all."

And I heard him exclaim after he yelled, "You all suck."
"Crappy Trunkmas to all, Blow me dumb ****."

OMG, I am laughing so hard!

I have my good days.


' He walked to the tree and said, "These presents are nice.
I'll sell them on e-bay, they'll fetch a good price." '

Captures his sleazy self-serving low-rent character!


That was my favorite line in the poem. It shows you the value of a
high quality Harvard music education.

____________________________________________

Horvath

This signature is now the ultimate power in the universe

Support the military, or else.
  #6  
Old December 17th 20, 03:56 PM posted to rec.skiing.alpine
[email protected]
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 118
Default The Night Before Trunkmas

[Default] On Wed, 16 Dec 2020 20:41:31 -0800 (PST),
" wrote this crap:

On Monday, December 14, 2020 at 8:03:36 PM UTC-8, wrote:
[Default] On Mon, 14 Dec 2020 17:32:25 -0800 (PST), Eviel Dewar
wrote this crap:
On Monday, December 14, 2020 at 11:33:56 AM UTC-5, wrote:
T' was the night before Trunkmas
and all through Steven's Pass
not a creature was stirring
not even Bert's lazy ass.
The ski gear was hung
in the hallway with care.
In the hopes that Trunky Claus
soon would be there.

With me at the computer
and wearing a robe and a cap
I was just settling down for
a long Trunkmas Eve's nap.

When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter
I sprang from my seat to see what was the matter.
When what to my wondering eyes should appear
a tiny dogsled and eight tiny huskies were there.

And a fat-assed driver so lazy and drunk
I knew in a moment it must be, "The Trunk."

He stomped onto the porch
and kicked in the front door,
grabbed the cookies and milk, and
said, "More and more."

He went to the kitchen, the fridge he did open.
Saw the goodies he wanted
and all the freebies he was hoping.
His pockets he filled with cranberries and yams.
His bag he filled with turkey and glazed hams.

He walked to the tree and said, "These presents are nice.
I'll sell them on e-bay, they'll fetch a good price."

He grabbed them all and went out to the yard,
got in his dogsled like a big tub of lard.
He cracked his big whip to awaken the team,
he cried out their names, so it would seem.

"On Flasher, on Barfer, on Boner, on Tits'on."
"On Vomit, on Stupid, on Ass-clown, and ****son."
"To the top of the fence, to the top of the wall.
Now fly away, fly away, once and for all."

And I heard him exclaim after he yelled, "You all suck."
"Crappy Trunkmas to all, Blow me dumb ****."

OMG, I am laughing so hard!

I have my good days.
____________________________________________


Holy ****, if that is what you call a good day I'd hate to see
one where you made a bigger fool out of yourself.
In any case, you didn't get your ass kicked. Which any self
respecting Santa would do. Nor did you crap your diapers.
Hey, I'll send you a case for Christmas. ID?
Change your diapers. You just crapped them again.
Idiot. How embarassing.


And I heard him exclaim after he yelled, "You all suck."
"Crappy Trunkmas to all, Blow me dumb ****."

____________________________________________

Horvath

This signature is now the ultimate power in the universe

Support the military, or else.
  #7  
Old December 19th 20, 12:35 AM posted to rec.skiing.alpine
Eviel Dewar
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 686
Default The Night Before Trunkmas

On Wednesday, December 16, 2020 at 11:43:23 PM UTC-5, wrote:
On Tuesday, December 15, 2020 at 12:15:19 PM UTC-8, wrote:
On Monday, December 14, 2020 at 11:03:36 PM UTC-5, wrote:
[Default] On Mon, 14 Dec 2020 17:32:25 -0800 (PST), Eviel Dewar
wrote this crap:
On Monday, December 14, 2020 at 11:33:56 AM UTC-5, wrote:
T' was the night before Trunkmas
and all through Steven's Pass
not a creature was stirring
not even Bert's lazy ass.
The ski gear was hung
in the hallway with care.
In the hopes that Trunky Claus
soon would be there.

With me at the computer
and wearing a robe and a cap
I was just settling down for
a long Trunkmas Eve's nap.

When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter
I sprang from my seat to see what was the matter.
When what to my wondering eyes should appear
a tiny dogsled and eight tiny huskies were there.

And a fat-assed driver so lazy and drunk
I knew in a moment it must be, "The Trunk."

He stomped onto the porch
and kicked in the front door,
grabbed the cookies and milk, and
said, "More and more."

He went to the kitchen, the fridge he did open.
Saw the goodies he wanted
and all the freebies he was hoping.
His pockets he filled with cranberries and yams.
His bag he filled with turkey and glazed hams.

He walked to the tree and said, "These presents are nice.
I'll sell them on e-bay, they'll fetch a good price."

He grabbed them all and went out to the yard,
got in his dogsled like a big tub of lard.
He cracked his big whip to awaken the team,
he cried out their names, so it would seem.

"On Flasher, on Barfer, on Boner, on Tits'on."
"On Vomit, on Stupid, on Ass-clown, and ****son."
"To the top of the fence, to the top of the wall.
Now fly away, fly away, once and for all."

And I heard him exclaim after he yelled, "You all suck."
"Crappy Trunkmas to all, Blow me dumb ****."

OMG, I am laughing so hard!
I have my good days.

' He walked to the tree and said, "These presents are nice.
I'll sell them on e-bay, they'll fetch a good price." '

Captures his sleazy self-serving low-rent character!

Holy ****. A convicted sex offender who calls himself Evil Pussy Fart calling ME a sleazy, self-serving, low-rent character!!!!!!!


My dear Schattie. YOU are the one who sold dog****-encrusted sneakers on Ebay, and was thrown off when he threatened and verbally abused the buyers who complained about it. YOU.
  #8  
Old December 19th 20, 01:02 AM posted to rec.skiing.alpine
Eviel Dewar
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 686
Default The Night Before Trunkmas

On Friday, December 18, 2020 at 8:39:06 PM UTC-5, wrote:
On Friday, December 18, 2020 at 5:35:23 PM UTC-8, wrote:
On Wednesday, December 16, 2020 at 11:43:23 PM UTC-5, wrote:
On Tuesday, December 15, 2020 at 12:15:19 PM UTC-8, wrote:
On Monday, December 14, 2020 at 11:03:36 PM UTC-5, wrote:
[Default] On Mon, 14 Dec 2020 17:32:25 -0800 (PST), Eviel Dewar
wrote this crap:
On Monday, December 14, 2020 at 11:33:56 AM UTC-5, wrote:
T' was the night before Trunkmas
and all through Steven's Pass
not a creature was stirring
not even Bert's lazy ass.
The ski gear was hung
in the hallway with care.
In the hopes that Trunky Claus
soon would be there.

With me at the computer
and wearing a robe and a cap
I was just settling down for
a long Trunkmas Eve's nap.

When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter
I sprang from my seat to see what was the matter.
When what to my wondering eyes should appear
a tiny dogsled and eight tiny huskies were there.

And a fat-assed driver so lazy and drunk
I knew in a moment it must be, "The Trunk."

He stomped onto the porch
and kicked in the front door,
grabbed the cookies and milk, and
said, "More and more."

He went to the kitchen, the fridge he did open.
Saw the goodies he wanted
and all the freebies he was hoping.
His pockets he filled with cranberries and yams.
His bag he filled with turkey and glazed hams.

He walked to the tree and said, "These presents are nice.
I'll sell them on e-bay, they'll fetch a good price."

He grabbed them all and went out to the yard,
got in his dogsled like a big tub of lard.
He cracked his big whip to awaken the team,
he cried out their names, so it would seem.

"On Flasher, on Barfer, on Boner, on Tits'on."
"On Vomit, on Stupid, on Ass-clown, and ****son."
"To the top of the fence, to the top of the wall.
Now fly away, fly away, once and for all."

And I heard him exclaim after he yelled, "You all suck."
"Crappy Trunkmas to all, Blow me dumb ****."

OMG, I am laughing so hard!
I have my good days.
' He walked to the tree and said, "These presents are nice.
I'll sell them on e-bay, they'll fetch a good price." '

Captures his sleazy self-serving low-rent character!
Holy ****. A convicted sex offender who calls himself Evil Pussy Fart calling ME a sleazy, self-serving, low-rent character!!!!!!!

My dear Schattie. YOU are the one who sold dog****-encrusted sneakers on Ebay, and was thrown off when he threatened and verbally abused the buyers who complained about it. YOU.

You pathetic, laughable, ludicrous dog**** encrusted idiot, you really are desperate. After all, you are a convicted sex offender. Nothing I ever did or nothing I ever will do could ever make me as sleazy, disgusting, and low-rent as you.


No, Schattie, I am not a sex offender, convicted or otherwise. YOU on the other hand are credibly accused by your own brother of molestation.

But more to the point, is this post a tacit admission that you did indeed sell dog****-encrusted sneakers on Ebay?
  #9  
Old December 21st 20, 02:01 AM posted to rec.skiing.alpine
Eviel Dewar
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 686
Default The Night Before Trunkmas

On Friday, December 18, 2020 at 9:12:51 PM UTC-5, wrote:
On Friday, December 18, 2020 at 6:02:06 PM UTC-8, wrote:
On Friday, December 18, 2020 at 8:39:06 PM UTC-5, wrote:
On Friday, December 18, 2020 at 5:35:23 PM UTC-8, wrote:
On Wednesday, December 16, 2020 at 11:43:23 PM UTC-5, wrote:
On Tuesday, December 15, 2020 at 12:15:19 PM UTC-8, wrote:
On Monday, December 14, 2020 at 11:03:36 PM UTC-5, wrote:
[Default] On Mon, 14 Dec 2020 17:32:25 -0800 (PST), Eviel Dewar
wrote this crap:
On Monday, December 14, 2020 at 11:33:56 AM UTC-5, wrote:
T' was the night before Trunkmas
and all through Steven's Pass
not a creature was stirring
not even Bert's lazy ass.
The ski gear was hung
in the hallway with care.
In the hopes that Trunky Claus
soon would be there.

With me at the computer
and wearing a robe and a cap
I was just settling down for
a long Trunkmas Eve's nap.

When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter
I sprang from my seat to see what was the matter.
When what to my wondering eyes should appear
a tiny dogsled and eight tiny huskies were there.

And a fat-assed driver so lazy and drunk
I knew in a moment it must be, "The Trunk."

He stomped onto the porch
and kicked in the front door,
grabbed the cookies and milk, and
said, "More and more."

He went to the kitchen, the fridge he did open.
Saw the goodies he wanted
and all the freebies he was hoping.
His pockets he filled with cranberries and yams.
His bag he filled with turkey and glazed hams.

He walked to the tree and said, "These presents are nice.
I'll sell them on e-bay, they'll fetch a good price."

He grabbed them all and went out to the yard,
got in his dogsled like a big tub of lard.
He cracked his big whip to awaken the team,
he cried out their names, so it would seem.

"On Flasher, on Barfer, on Boner, on Tits'on."
"On Vomit, on Stupid, on Ass-clown, and ****son."
"To the top of the fence, to the top of the wall.
Now fly away, fly away, once and for all."

And I heard him exclaim after he yelled, "You all suck."
"Crappy Trunkmas to all, Blow me dumb ****."

OMG, I am laughing so hard!
I have my good days.
' He walked to the tree and said, "These presents are nice.
I'll sell them on e-bay, they'll fetch a good price." '

Captures his sleazy self-serving low-rent character!
Holy ****. A convicted sex offender who calls himself Evil Pussy Fart calling ME a sleazy, self-serving, low-rent character!!!!!!!
My dear Schattie. YOU are the one who sold dog****-encrusted sneakers on Ebay, and was thrown off when he threatened and verbally abused the buyers who complained about it. YOU.
You pathetic, laughable, ludicrous dog**** encrusted idiot, you really are desperate. After all, you are a convicted sex offender. Nothing I ever did or nothing I ever will do could ever make me as sleazy, disgusting, and low-rent as you.

No, Schattie, I am not a sex offender, convicted or otherwise.

Bull****. Provided an ID and I will run your record. As perverted as you are, no way. After all, why are you hiding? Because if you get identified, you go back to prison. Try again, freak.
YOU on the other hand are credibly accused by your own brother of molestation.

Credible? In what insane world, freak? From a pathological liar who lived with his mother his entire life, and then made up a whopper of a lie and falsely accused me after I outed the **** for molesting both of us? Credible? Hell, idiot, the fat freak even admitted he lied before he ate himself to death. Whereas YOU are credibly accused of being a convicted sex offender, all kinds of evidence.
BWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
You really are desperate. Pathetic. Laughable. Disgusting. Despicable. Tell ya what. You make that allegation in person, and I will credibly put you in the hospital. ID? BWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Of course, your cowardice is a tacit admission that you are a convicted sex offender. BWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

But more to the point, is this post a tacit admission that you did indeed sell dog****-encrusted sneakers on Ebay?

But more to the point, you keep pulling Pussy Fart sneakers out of your ass. Clue time. Never sold a pair of sneakers. Ever. Period.


My dear Schattie, you did. I distinctly recall reading comments about it, either directly on the Ebay website, or from comments copied from there to here; I can't now remember which. The user said that you had sold him a pair of sneakers, and that they had dog**** on them, which he characterized as "pathetic".

In fact, if I remember correctly, there was a special group of Ebay users informally set up to discuss you and your disturbing behavior. You got kicked off of Ebay for good reasons, Schattie, just as you've been kicked out of many other venues.
  #10  
Old December 22nd 20, 02:56 AM posted to rec.skiing.alpine
[email protected]
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 118
Default The Night Before Trunkmas

[Default] On Sun, 20 Dec 2020 19:09:26 -0800 (PST),
" wrote this crap:

In fact, if I remember correctly, there was a special group of Ebay

users informally set up to discuss you and your disturbing
behavior. You got kicked off of Ebay for good reasons, Schattie,
just as you've been kicked out of many other venues.

Kicked out? How about got tired of dealing with disgusting
pathological liars and thieves and quit doing business with them?
More accurate, to say the least. Hey, what other venues?


How about an al-anon meeting? or a temple when you gave the bird to
the rabbi and the entire congregation? Oh, there's more, there's
more.

____________________________________________

Horvath

This signature is now the ultimate power in the universe

Support the military, or else.
 




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